Let's face it, Jon Cryer is the real victim here.

I haven't seen a train wreck like Charlie Sheen in a long time.  In fact, he makes Lindsay Lohan look like Carol Brady.  If you have 15 minutes of your life to kill you simply must listen to his 15 minute rant to Alex Jones.  A few of my favorite excerpts:

• A turd on a tugboat
• Vatican Warlock Assassin
• "I'm an F18"
• "The only thing I'm addicted to, is winning"

So...is that "winning" like the Cubs winning the World Series winning?  Because if he's winning, I'm sure glad I'm losing.  I haven't heard a coke induced rant like that in a long time.  And yes, coke induced despite his ability to close his eyes and cure himself in a nanosecond.  I must thank him for my new favorite saying..."A turd on a tugboat".  I'm going to try and sneak that into casual conversation at least once a day.  Preferably at a meeting at work...you know, to catch people off guard.  Update:  I just did a Google Image search for "turd on a tugboat" and the results are not good. 

I realize that this post had nothing to do with either our life, or dogs.  So I'll right that wrong immediately. Pete has discovered a passion for Wall Street and investments.  Rigby, has discovered she is dispassionate about being clean.  (If you can't read the caption, click on the image to see it full size)

Groupons, coupons and rogue escapes.

I'm a bit skeptical when it comes to amazing deals.  For instance, I saw a post from a friend on Facebook that said "using coupons got me $600 worth of merchandise for $2.70".  Too good to be true?  Probably.  However it did intrigue me.  I have no patience for looking, clipping, finding, or using coupons.  In fact, when someone in front of me in line at the grocery store pulls them out, I usually utter a big "sigh" and an eye roll.  I guess to me saving .70 on orange juice simply isn't worth the time of the entire coupon process.  Maybe this is the snob in me, but I'm actually embarrassed to present a coupon at any establishment.  A restaurant, a department store, a grocery store...anywhere.  I do have a good friend (you know who you are!) that uses them all of the time and is much more frugal with her money than me.  I could take some notes there.  That all being said, the newest craze in Group Coupons...ie:  Living Social and Groupon is a pretty great thing.  I've purchased two of them lately.  One was a two hour house cleaning for $40, normally $80.  I just redeemed this coupon yesterday....and I was pretty impressed!  So impressed I'm tempted to never clean my house again.  It was wonderful coming home to spotless floors and bathrooms.  Having two dogs though...that probably won't last long.  The other Groupon I purchased was for a comedy night at Morty's Comedy Joint in Indy.  $15 for two people and an appetizer...normally $38.  Pretty good deal!  I'm saving that one for one of my friend Patrick's performances. 

Anywho, the only down side to all of this is that sometimes these businesses don't realize the influx of business they're going to attract and become so overloaded they can't fulfull the coupons in a timely manner.  That cleaning Groupon for example was purchased in November...just redeemed yesterday.  Oh well, better late than never I suppose. 

Rigby made her first rogue escape the other night, necessitating an emergency trip to Home Depot for a fence brace, lock...thingy.  Our gate barely latched as it was, and I think the wind must've blown it open.  Luckily enough when Michael went outside and called her she came running back from about five houses down.  Lesson learned.   It's very difficult to be angry with something that adorable.  Her Dora the Explorer days are over we hope, as the gate is now officially fixed.  Michael almost lost a thumb in the process...but it's fixed.  I hope everyone had a great President's Day, and got some great deals on half priced furniture.  How did President's Day and furniture sales become correlated anyway?

Warning:  The following is part of my own political agenda.  If you get a chance, PLEASE sign this petition to KEEP funding for Planned Parenthood.  Poor women need this for HIV tests, birth control and cancer screenings.  This is NOT an assault against abortion like Senator Mike Pence will have you believe!   If you think our social services such as welfare are overloaded now...wait until this bill passes.  Keep your laws off my body! 

West side is the best side.

This is my friend Frank, in one of our Doctoral classes.

Well, my sweep across the nation commences March 2nd.  And by sweep I mean a violent Swiffer across the nation.  Back and forth, then back and forth, and you guessed it...back and forth one last time.  Travel is all set for my two trips to Seattle to educate the fine people of Academia on our services here at The Learning House.  I really am lucky to have such an amazing product to be peddling.  It's also going to be pretty amazing to get to go to all of these college campuses nation wide.  I might have to go back to school and get a doctorate just so I can fit in with these people.  I'll go the lazy route and get it in Underwater Basket Weaving, or something similar.  No one will ever ask what I'm a doctor of. 

Rigby is officially bigger than Pete now.  Taller, but not quite as thick.  I should commend our slim and trim little guy on his loss of 5 pounds!  He went from 26 to 21.5 pounds between vet visits.  He was getting pretty pudgy and I can only hope his Colts jersey will not be quite so snug next season.  A combination of being constantly chased, chewed on, jumped on, jumped over, trampled on, and generally abused by his little sister might've contributed to this increase in fitness too.  Poor guy.  You can just see the disgust on his face in this picture too...don't worry buddy, she won't be allowed up there too much longer. 

And now for your viewing enjoyment...Rigby fetching!

Rigby, this Spring's hottest accessory!

Aunt Jennifer came to town this weekend to meet the Rigster and pay us a visit. Jen being the huge dog lover she is, naturally adored Rigby (who wouldn't?!). For now she fits nicely in oversized handbags...but soon I doubt she'll be going in that purse so easily. They say Aussie's are supposed to get 40-50 pounds, so we must cherish these puppy times. Pete can still lap her when we're playing fetch in the yard but those days are also numbered. He kind of got the short end of the stick in the leg department.

After temperatures in the 20s, we were lucky enough to enjoy a coatless weekend in the 50s here in the Bluegrass State. It still feels weird to say that, after 29 years in Indiana. Luckily I'm only about 10 minutes from the state line. We went out for sushi last night and had a lovely breakfast at Cafe Lou Lou this morning, then Jen headed back to the Circle City. It won't be long until our next visit...we're going up next weekend to see my good friend Patrick perform some stand-up comedy. He's getting REALLY good! Check him out sometime HERE. When I was working at eTapestry...he'd try out material on me all the time. I'm so glad he finally went for it and auditioned. He's a regular now at Morty's Comedy Joint in Indy. This will be my first chance to see him live, as he usually performs during the week.

In other news, Vegas is only 6 short weeks away! I can't wait. I've been there numerous times and it just doesn't get old. I don't know if it's the lights, the energy, the shows or the elaborate hotels. I just love it. At least Pete and Rigby won't have to be boarded during these upcoming travels, they'll get to crash at Grandma RuthAnn's new farm! Mom and Mike will be here permanently the second week of March. We're both pretty excited to have 27 acres to take the dogs to. While I'm not exactly the farm, outdoorsy type...I think I'll enjoy fishing and getting some sun on the dock! That's Michael with the realtor when we visited the farm back in August. What better way to welcome Mom and Mike back to the Hoosier state than to pawn our dogs off on them for 4 days!

Coming soon, to a shower near you.

The feline version of Norman Bates (Psycho) lives in our house. He's a chubby, slow, Tuxedo Tabby named Spencer. His nickname used to be Spencer Smalls when I got him from the Indianapolis Humane Society...that nickname is well, expired. For some reason this cat is obsessed with the shower. Obsessed. I have previously mentioned his OCD like behavior and this I believe to be directly correlated to it! Every morning when I'm in the shower he gets in between the liner and curtain. He will bat at droplets of water running down the liner, stick his paw under the water stream, and try to attack me if I get too close to him. He's a nut. Most cats are terrified of water but if I splash him, he remains unfazed.

Nighttime behavior is a bit different and more bizarre. Again, like clockwork when I brush my teeth and wash my face he crawls in between the liner and curtain. He just sits there. We play this little game where I bat at the curtain, he bites and attacks back...it sounds crazy but I assure you it's very cute. Ahh...us cat people are crazy. Gotta love my little Norman Bates cat. If you miss him in the picture to the right...it's because he's in his spot...

This dog needs an agent.

What adorable puppy made the main page of loldogs today?! OURS. That's who! (Of course I'm sure my witty caption had something to do with it...)

She is available for birthday parties, weddings, bar mitzvahs, bat mitzvahs, and special appearances. (Owner not responsible for damaged property due to teething).

February Potpourri!

The Rigster is getting too smart for her own good. She has discovered the "Mecca" in the household...which is the cat room. She now makes a beeline for the cat food everytime she gets let inside. I'm convinced Pete has somehow communicated this to her in secret canine lingo. Perhaps they're in cahoots. She has also now figured out how to get up the hardwood stairs to the second floor. This is both dangerous and convenient. We no longer have to carry her upstairs, but now she can try and chase the cats up to their last private sanctuary. If we're being honest here, those cats could stand to be chased around a bit. They're both at their winter weights. I have a video of Rigby coming up the stairs on her own, the first day she mastered it:

Rigby has also gotten some very well deserved press on the popular site The Cheezburger Network. A site dedicated to cute animal pictures and captions. She is currently up for voting to make the main page. You can vote for her here.

In other exciting news, two awesome vacations are coming up! We are going to Las Vegas for my birthday at the end of March, and then to Oak Island, NC for a week in July. This will be my third trip to Oak Island with my "adopted" family, The Heimanns. If you haven't heard of it...then that's a good thing. One of the things I love about Oak Island is its lack of commerciality. It's very relaxing, and very pretty with all of the different types of beach houses. Should be a great week to get some fun in the sun. Vegas on the otherhand won't be relaxing at all...and that's just how I want it! I'm seeing my second Cirque Du Soleil show this time around, The Beatles Love at The Mirage. I'm so excited! Cirque shows are amazing in and of themselves, but couple that with my favorite band of all time and it should be an amazing experience.

I hope everyone in the Midwest has survived the Snowpocalypse!